Cubicle Rhymes

Moved

2011-08-14T06:43:00.002-04:00

This stuff has moved;
just follow this link.
That's where you'll find
even more, I think.

Football and slot machines

2011-01-30T10:44:00.003-05:00

In most sports they play
a large number of games
to try to make sure
that pure luck's not to blame.

But football is different;
you can see at a glance
they play so few games
there's a big role for chance.

A game can be changed
by a trip or a spill,
obsessive game planning
and world-class skill

are much less important
than what luck might hand 'em.
The outcome of football's
designed to be random.

Bubble Bath

2011-01-25T12:20:00.001-05:00

Lorenz contracted his Alcubierre
so before he quite left
he was already there.

Poleeching

2011-01-23T10:54:00.001-05:00

When law enforcement's secret,
it does not take deduction
to see this thing for what it is:
it is itself corruption.

A degree of charity

2011-01-23T08:22:00.003-05:00

So chilly outside
it's knocking my knees.
Please send in donations;
we need more degrees.

Who's news

2011-01-23T07:35:00.001-05:00

Williams and Olberman,
Susteren, Blitzer.
News -- these folks
think they lead it.
The BBC may have a better idea;
"there is news", they say,
"I'll just read it."

Unintended effects

2011-01-23T07:30:00.000-05:00

Glass is made from opaque sand,
plants grow out of silent land.
The bile the Rush can generate --
can it result in more than hate?

Newt: carrier or germ?

2011-01-23T07:28:00.001-05:00

Gingrich disguises divisive ideas
in pretty plastic prose to beguile us.
It slips right through our morals
and attacks our better minds
a strategy used by a deadly virus.

But what is dreaming

2011-01-22T12:30:00.001-05:00

Overzealous guarding over
things they claim are theirs,
many-layered management,
oak desks and leather chairs,
business plans and powerpoint,
marketing to spare,
given to obsessive
detail-centric stares,
no apparent self reflection,
chasing thin forms of perfection,
hierarchic non-election,
ever more precise inspection.
Strangely twisted corporate dream
or just the average football team.

The game plan, the head coach, and the very big wish

2011-01-22T12:09:00.001-05:00

They play a few seconds
then wait for a while,
get silent and set in their stance.
They play for a moment
and try it again,
in the hope that it's not really chance.

The NFL loves complexity

2011-01-22T12:00:00.000-05:00

Each NFL team has an offense
and a defense, as everyone knows.
The two should be made independent
and each Sunday play different foes.

They're all the same to me

2011-01-21T07:58:00.004-05:00

It's said and repeated that snowflakes all differ;
there aren't any twins anywhere.
Outside there are billions
to shovel and right now
I can't recall why I should care.

It's only funny at first

2011-01-20T17:25:00.001-05:00

MacArthur Wheeler was astounded --
humble beams of light
had passed right through his lemon juice
as if they had the right
to obey the laws of physics
and ignore what he believed;
this kind of thinking's all around --
folks ought to be peeved.

Dunning-Kruger Effect

2011-01-20T17:06:00.001-05:00

The agonizing Dunning-Kruger
confidence of fools
is maddening; you can't explain
arithmetic to mules.

Common Household Pests 35

2011-01-20T16:59:00.001-05:00

Dingo moves in;
you'd like him to go.
And that means
you must join his pack
don't you know.
Now, he doesn't do email,
you can't telegram;
your only recourse
is the entrance exam.
To take and to pass
such a test from a dingo
requires, to start,
that you master his lingo.
Figure that out
then a challenge for you:
convince him you mean it
when you say "adieu".
You must be convincing;
he must think it true
when you say in his language
"yap yip yap aaarroooo".

Wilhelm Conrad Röntgen

2011-01-20T16:36:00.003-05:00

The finder of X-rays -- he did it so well,
he received in '01 the first-ever Nobel.

Max Planck

2011-01-20T16:25:00.003-05:00

Precise bits of energy -- that was the clue
as he worked out the formula E is h v

Galileo Galilei

2011-01-20T09:42:00.003-05:00

He wrote about astronomy
and so lost his autonomy.

Discourse, Datcourse, when's recess?

2011-01-19T08:45:00.000-05:00

How do you know that you know what you know?
Is it frequent retelling that makes it all so?
Is it argumentation that wins a position,
with truth as the prize for the best rhetorician?

Sophistry's misuse has grown so eclectic
I think that of late we neglect dialectic.
Teachers should clearly explain that "to know"
is less about "argue" and more about "show".

Thomas Edison

2011-01-18T21:19:00.002-05:00

His methods did not include ruminating;
experiments he thought more illuminating.

Nicola Tesla

2011-01-18T10:00:00.002-05:00

Causing in Edison great consternation
his current inventions gave us alternation.

Charles Darwin

2011-01-18T09:47:00.003-05:00

His Beagle-voyage sleuthin'
made him think 'bout evolution;
he observed with fascination
still-evolving speciation.

Niels Bohr

2011-01-18T09:28:00.003-05:00

He introduced clarity
to complementarity:
you can't know where-went-um
for things with momentum.

Ernest Rutherford

2011-01-17T07:05:00.011-05:00

When he met an atom he
studied its anatomy.

Well, it's a job...

2011-01-16T07:47:00.001-05:00

By some system, perhaps gravitational
the zodiac's thought to mean lots
'cause I guess back when we were gestational
it affected our prenatal thoughts.

But it's oddly convenient and facile
when you say that the future's ordained.
It just means we agree you're important --
in the end nothing's really explained.

Space Ghost

2011-01-16T07:31:00.000-05:00

The earth, as we know,
hurtles quickly through space --
and it's said, about ghosts,
that they stay in one place.

I imagine a spook
might be very annoyed
if the manse, in its orbit
left him haunting the void.

Yes, I mean what you see

2011-01-16T07:20:00.000-05:00

When you ask what is real,
just what do you mean?
That what you might think
matches what you have seen?
But your sight is an aspect
of what's in your mind;
if your eyes were magnetic
just think what you'd find.

Knower's Arc

2011-01-16T07:09:00.001-05:00

Throwing a bullet or rock
has its uses
but to our old brains
it's the arc that amuses.

Glock Schpiel

2011-01-16T07:05:00.000-05:00

It's uncomfortably true
if you carry a gun
that deep inside you
something thinks it is fun.

Allow the ox

2011-01-15T10:23:00.001-05:00

When recently disgruntled
I regained my gruntlement
when accosted (at two dollars ten)
by Rob, who was a gent
of a well known local family
whose businesses include
some sort of demolition
which they often must re fuse.
It laxed me once and then again
and I'm so full in grate
that I've been chatting as I nap;
I just lie down and state.

Ophiuchus?

2011-01-14T14:34:00.003-05:00

A single, confirmed, Sagittarian
who found out he was really Aquarian
called off all his dates
and explained to his mates
"This will change who I think about marryin'"

Cap'n Quarterdeck

2011-01-14T10:19:00.000-05:00

You'll find Cap'n Quarterdeck
down at the docks
spinning yarns; he's always available.
He'll advise any sailor;
they'll take it to heart --
his rep (like his boat): unassailable.

Living statue

2011-01-14T10:14:00.001-05:00

Old homeless McTavish
lives rough in the park.
His bond with the birds is unbrekkable.
They perch on his shoulders
and roost on his hat;
his attire is thus somewhat peccable.

Speech hate

2011-01-13T11:19:00.003-05:00

When you hear a comment
and feel affronted
responding in kind
creates cycles unwanted
and then the discussion
by rancor is haunted;
by stepping outside
of the frame
anger's daunted.

Snow day after

2011-01-13T11:18:00.001-05:00

I'd like to attend
but I cannot just now;
I'm stuck in my driveway
awaiting the plow.

Snow day

2011-01-12T09:03:00.002-05:00

Outside: wind and blizzard
and freezing ice fog;
Inside: pile of blankets
and (snoozing) the dog.

He's not at all worried
and hasn't a care;
he checked before napping --
there's bacon to spare.

One one one one one

2011-01-11T06:02:00.002-05:00

Today's date is unusual;
five ones stand in a row.
It's meaningful somehow I'm sure.
But how? Gee, I don't know.

Common Household Pests 34

2011-01-07T20:26:00.002-05:00

It's a thousand to one if you find a mazama
in your closet or attic along with his mama,
they're shy and reclusive, avoid too much drama,
might be disguised as a small oddball llama,
pose little danger; you won't come to hama,
and they somehow attract the stray colon: and, comma.

Tech journalism is drivel

2011-01-06T06:21:00.003-05:00

Apparently the only way
to write some tech-blog filler:
read press release at CES;
pen headline query "...killer?"

Income opportunity

2011-01-06T06:16:00.002-05:00

Romanian witches are now to be taxed
and to this they are feeling averse.
But instead of a cost, it might bring them gain;
if it works, folks will pay for that curse.

Google begins to stink

2011-01-05T10:15:00.004-05:00

I'm tired of google;
their constant surmising
that I will put up with
their lame advertising.

They're 'sposed to be clever
and so it's surprising
that they are such boneheads
we'll end up despising.

Playtimes

2011-01-05T10:08:00.002-05:00

One little dog is claiming
that she wants to go and play
in the snow outside the house
that's fallen on the ground today.

The other little dog says
there's no way that's what she wants;
she'd much prefer just staying
here inside her nice warm haunts.

They're both dogs -- one loves winter
while the other just says "brrrr."
I really think it all comes down
to different kinds of fur.

The sociopath in the boardroom

2011-01-05T10:01:00.003-05:00

Corporations sometimes make
decisions, which it's plain,
are clearly, simply, evidently
out and out insane.

In fact I now suspect that since
their very first inception,
corporate mental illness
has been rule, not exception.

Where is that pork chop

2011-01-05T09:59:00.001-05:00

To live in the moment
most doggies are able;
they don't muse "what if
I snitch food from that table".

Common Household Pests 33

2011-01-04T08:40:00.002-05:00

If you happen to drive a Camaro or 'Stang
a zoril might grab it, the punk.
He's a loner who travels without any gang;
just surrender the car; he's a skunk.

The business cycle

2011-01-04T08:21:00.002-05:00

Investors just hate
that investments might fail;
an approach that works well
unless laws are for sale.

So they buy their new bills
and their loopholes for cash
and they don't recognize
their own role in each crash.

And the structure they live in,
the system they've spawned,
will continue to warp
and someday will be gone.

The sorry few left
will think back to when
they weren't hungry or cold
and they'll build it again.

Gadgetree

2011-01-03T15:41:00.003-05:00

Holidays over
and gadgets were had;
some will be useful
but most are just fad.
A few are made well;
the rest are just bad,
with design, fit, and finish
that just make me sad.

Primacy

2011-01-03T08:23:00.002-05:00

A very prime year
is this twenty-eleven;
you can sum it from primes --
start at one-fifty-seven.

You are not yours

2011-01-03T07:23:00.003-05:00

First day of the week
in a workaday town,
we plod under gray,
the economy's down.
On corners the desperate
display desperate signs;
all their benefits gone,
facing desperate times.
And we're told to look forward
and redouble our striving
in order to keep
faceless companies thriving.
And we're told we should care;
that economy's king
as the rulers speak falsely
about everything.
We don't see ahead,
it's backwards we grope
as we sift through the past
for a reason to hope.

What do they really think?

2011-01-02T08:21:00.003-05:00

Economists have started claiming
better outlooks in the cards.
Makes you think they might be gaming:
whistling past a dark graveyard.

Acculturation

2011-01-02T08:15:00.002-05:00

People protest vigorously:
this is a democracy.
An early schooling exercise
to prepare young brains for future lies.

Reboot

2011-01-01T15:19:00.004-05:00

The world won't end in twenty twelve
so save your dumb elation.
In fact it ended long ago --
you're in a simulation.

So where did THIS idea come from

2011-01-01T08:37:00.003-05:00

Footballs will fly for the new year (today).
Ever wonder why custom says just a few play
while the rest of us watch from our sofas and seats?
It's possibly helping us all be obeasts.

I used to just use ink

2010-12-31T07:51:00.003-05:00

Radiation, carbon vapor, heavy metals in the soil,
mining, ore extraction plants, carbon vapor, coal and logs,
sludge and scrap in distant places, tankers full of gas and oil,
that is part of what's behind your reading of each little blog.

Small government

2010-12-31T07:45:00.003-05:00

Governments all claim legitimacy
but it's odd boiled down to a nation of three:
if A teams with B for complaint about C,
do they then have the right to hang C from a tree?

Billy does not care

2010-12-31T07:32:00.002-05:00

Billy the Kid gets no pardon.
Admittedly he was a villain.
The mind of a ruler (in nutshell):
Make them a promise, then kill 'em.

Here's to 2011

2010-12-31T07:05:00.001-05:00

Some years have truly prospered,
some others really didn'ce.
As for the one that's ending
I have two words: good riddance.

Don't be google

2010-12-30T09:45:00.003-05:00

They say "Don't be evil" but
with a brief "ahem"
then you hear that evil's what
does not profit them.

Common Household Pests 32

2010-12-30T08:27:00.003-05:00

What a surprise when a urial flies
and alights in your patio space.
They're stubborn though and before you can know
they've moved all of their stuff to your place.

They're quite territorial,
and what is morial,
they love to compete
and they always keep scorial.

And that is the secret to regain your home;
it's a weakness you're able to use.
Invite them to play some good games you can win,
they'll stomp out 'cause they don't like to lose.

Walkabout

2010-12-30T08:01:00.005-05:00

Events are often depressing
and the way people's minds work it seems
that the most lachrymose and distressing
of the real leaks into your dreams.

It happens to everyone sometimes;
the oddity starts when you feel
that the process has started reversing
and your dreams start to leak into real.

New years leave

2010-12-30T07:57:00.002-05:00

It's the end of the year
and if you've been missing
summing-up stories
and vague reminiscing
then now is the time
for which you've been waiting;
it will be the new year
'fore this sludge starts abating.

Why it's called a dead line

2010-12-29T07:59:00.003-05:00

When it's more important that something be said
than to have a an original thought in your head,
when the empty page and silent air
demand that some content be uploaded there,
when the job is "say something" not "something to say"
because it's assumed there's new stuff every day,
then the writer and reader in each topic sector
both lose, from disuse, their nonsense detector.

Location, location, location

2010-12-29T07:53:00.002-05:00

A dumb idea that bears disputing
just like Bob and pen computing:
location now is claimed to be
a killer app for you and me.
But digital tools and identity
are not located; they're part of me.

Common Household Pests 31

2010-12-28T07:14:00.002-05:00

It doesn't matter if you're strong,
it will still take you oh so long
and put you out of mood for song
to rid your bath of a stray dugong.

Common Household Pests 30

2010-12-28T07:03:00.002-05:00

Once in a while an angwantibo
moves in if your house is Colonial.
It's nearly unheard of to get him to go;
his attitude's fairly baronial.

He's called a bear monkey (just look at those ears)
and that is not all; what is moris,
into some rhymers he strikes some odd fears
'cause his family name? It is loris.

News Corpse

2010-12-27T08:24:00.002-05:00

Journals like the New York Times
have very little nerve or spine.
They're vital to democracies
but they are also companies.
Corporations live to earn;
all other outcomes wait their turn
and if the books are in the red
lead stories are celebs instead.
When all's in balance, things work fine --
when not, democracy declines.

Have an ice day

2010-12-27T08:03:00.002-05:00

The thing about snow --
and we've got lots, you know --
you really must slow
on the road if you go.

So you might turn up late,
but a much better fate
is to sight tight and wait
for the storm to abate.

Common Household Pests 29.5

2010-12-26T09:11:00.001-05:00

Planned to write about a lizard.
Never mind -- here comes a blizzard.

Snow sower

2010-12-26T09:05:00.002-05:00

There's something that keeps toying
with us, coming and going as it will;
it can be annoying
to us, finally we've had our fill.

Dropping things right on our heads,
ruining shoes of leather --
it's time that someone did something
about this dratted weather.

Christmas Morning Pests

2010-12-25T07:03:00.003-05:00

It happens sometimes (rarely)
you awake on Christmas, then
you find some tired reindeer
all asleep, and in your den.

It's natural that they're weary;
all that flying takes its toll.
And by the way, they're hungry too;
is there some jelly roll?

Then later, nearly dinner time,
all rested, they'll decide
to head back home -- without that sleigh
it's quite an easy glide.

Yuletide Stories

2010-12-24T10:02:00.004-05:00

Stories at this time of year are at pains
to show, demonstrate, moralize, and explain
that the gifts and the presents that we all exchange
are really beside the point; not, in the main,
the season's main reason; another remains.
So we speak, though we act for material gains.

Chupa what?

2010-12-24T08:02:00.004-05:00

While commuting to my jobra
out of darkness came a blobra
Heard no "obra" or "cadobra" --
could it be a chupacabra?

Strings and bathing

2010-12-24T07:51:00.004-05:00

Archimedes --remember, that guy with the bath --
started things off that today call for math
most advanced; it's one of the hardest of things
to comprehend how it's all made out of strings.

Knee and Her

2010-12-24T07:42:00.004-05:00

Humanity is some (not all)
related to neanderthal;
other branches seemed to fall
but don't expect it all to stall
or hit some existential wall;
we may soon find we're just a small
percentage of a greater all.

Fossils d'nae?

2010-12-24T07:29:00.002-05:00

Sapiens, neanderthal;
those ancient folks went rovin'.
Wandered here and wandered there;
and some were Denisovan.

Think inside the box

2010-12-23T09:14:00.003-05:00

Corporation-thinking just
adores the status-Q.
"Creative" means it isn't;
and "improved" means nothing's new.
"Work" is often touted
by the ones who never do,
and the more sincere
that they appear
the more their words aren't true.

Common Household Pests 29

2010-12-23T09:12:00.001-05:00

When your house is old
and full of antiques,
it's the sort of a refuge
a coelacanth seeks.

And if he decides
that your drawing room's tops,
just accept it;
coelacanth customs don't stop.

Multiple Universes 17

2010-12-22T06:29:00.002-05:00

Have you heard of many universes?
Everything, they say,
Is happening in all the ways
it might, all night and day.

Implications: staggering;
reality unfettered.
If anything can happen
then this rhyme, somewhere, is better.

Multiple Universes 42

2010-12-22T06:21:00.002-05:00

Very many everythings,
existences galore!
What the all the many
extra universes for?

They might be like ships' ballast
so that storms at sea aren't feared.
We need it, 'cause reality --
for us -- is getting weird.

Everything in its place

2010-12-21T07:11:00.003-05:00

Speaking of weather,
some enjoy snow
which is really much bether
in a place where you go
and then return home
where it's warmer, and rains
while behind you
the chilly white layer remains.

Pack Rapts

2010-12-20T15:28:00.003-05:00

They choose to snooze
and snooze with chews;
they're amused to peruse
all pronouncements of mews.
You cannot infuse
their views with the blues;
they're too cheerful. But news:
they are dogs, yes, but whose?

Eclipse

2010-12-20T09:20:00.003-05:00

Turn off all your gadgetry
power down all of your chips.
Step outside this evening
and check out the lunar eclipse.

Viewing Renewing

2010-12-20T09:10:00.004-05:00

On TV sets throughout the nation
viewers tune to their favorite station.
There's nothing 'bout war
'cause that's such a bore
compared to skin exfoliation.

Blaming the Pets

2010-12-19T08:53:00.003-05:00

When a leftover roast
is not to be found,
our answer is easy:
it must have been Hound.

When we find scratches
on this thing or that,
our quick explanation:
it had to be Cat.

When furniture's flattened
there's nothing else for us
but to say, with a sigh,
"Oh that darn Brontosaurus."

Christmas Shopping

2010-12-18T09:13:00.002-05:00

Shopping excursions
mean miles of traveling,
moods getting edgy
and tempers unraveling,
chatting degrading
to addle-brained babbling,
driving in circles
while parking-place grabbling,
peeves escalating
to in-the-back stabbling.
Time to resolve
to do more taxi-cabbling.

Holiday Triangulation

2010-12-18T09:06:00.003-05:00

The mathematician who celebrates Christmas
simplifies things to a narrower isthmus;
omitting two points at the top of the tree
he tops it all off with a gold Christmas three.

Common Household Pests 28

2010-12-16T09:22:00.002-05:00

My timbers piratical
should have been shivered
when pouch diplomatical
just was delivered

to door of my house
and it could have been bad
but it seems I've acquired
a senior aoudad.

He moved in when last
I vacationed, I fear,
and he's in the U.N.
so the traffic 'round here

is congested with all
of his parcels and mail.
I've tried many times
to evict him, but failed.

The problem, of course,
are those horns and his habit
of butting me 'til I say
"stay then, dagnabit!"

Big Spender

2010-12-15T06:58:00.003-05:00

I've ramped up my spending for Christmas this year --
economy needs me to boost it, I hear.
To pay twenty thousand is what I intend;
I think that's a great many pennies to spend.

Common Household Pests 27

2010-12-14T13:22:00.005-05:00

Vexacious existence?
You'll find that you live it
when offering shelter
to grumbling grivets.

They find many faults
with the things that you do;
with your cooking, your cleaning,
your pants and your shoes.

They'll hide and they'll peek
and they'll dress in disguise,
all to see what you're up to,
those nosey spy guys.

And what they do then
will just make you more bitter:
they broadcast your secrets --
those grivets use Twitter.

Common Household Pests 26

2010-12-10T07:51:00.004-05:00

When a coypu moves in --
might call himself nutria --
your prospects are grim;
here's what he'll do to ya:

He'll relax in your tub
and he'll muddy your mat,
treat your house like his club
will that brown beverrat.

He will eat all your greens
and drink your best vino.
As haughty as queens
is that snob castorino.

You can chase him with cleaver
while screaming "no more!";
Like his cousin the beaver
He'll just gnaw through your door.

The Entrepreneurs

2010-12-07T18:17:00.004-05:00

They partied and flirted
but then stopped-- prevention!
Their fun was diverted,
which led to invention
that soon was converted
to cash and to pension
so then they reverted
to their first intention:
they partied and flirted.

Fritzie the Schnauzer Knows His Rights

2010-12-06T18:45:00.003-05:00

I have resided
in seventeen houses
with my dog Fritzie
who constantly schnauzes.
The schnauzing's a problem;
it bothers the neighbors
when they are attending
to various labors.
I've spoken to Fritzie
but he knows his rights:
to sniff and to growl
and to schnauze
as he likes.
So we move once again,
little Fritzie and me,
and I wonder, as always
what schnauzing might be.

Common Household Pests 25 & Residences 7

2010-12-06T08:59:00.004-05:00

If you're a bird
a nest is the best,
but not if you woof
or long for a roof.

Of a lodge in a pond
those beavers are fond;
they dive in the dark
to retrieve some snack bark.

But of all the editions
of living conditions,
one fugitive mouse
wants to live in my house.

Residences 6, or, The Third Pig was a Contractor

2010-12-06T07:20:00.004-05:00

A wolf is fierce
and he runs nimbly
but he won't fit
down no chimbly;
house of bricks --
safe as can be,
when heated with
'lectricity.

Residences 5

2010-12-06T07:15:00.003-05:00

House of water
house of air
house of cards;
three kinds of lair
that bode unwell
for leather chair.
A house of wood
or stone is finer
as a spot
for your recliner.

Residences 4

2010-12-06T07:10:00.004-05:00

Living in imagination
often gets new paint.
Monday it can look postmodern,
Then on Tuesday, quaint.
You'll be convinced your house is real;
for others, though, it ain't,
unless they dream your dream with you
asleep (or they might faint).

Residences 3

2010-12-06T07:08:00.001-05:00

If you're scared of the dark
then you must be more brave
to enjoy country living
in a nice homey cave.

Residences 2

2010-12-06T07:03:00.002-05:00

A house in a tree
needs a trunk not too thin
or your glass of iced tea
might be spilled by the wind.

Residences 1

2010-12-05T06:55:00.003-05:00

The hassles of castles
as dwellings is telling;
some fights among knights
were 'cause talk's loud as yelling
and echoes arose --
sound finds stone walls impelling.

Common Household Pests 24

2010-12-05T06:53:00.002-05:00

A teen in your house
is a pest most particular
whose appetite's huge
and requests are vehicular --
to control one you need
to be travel-restrictular.